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Say Hello to Cleverbot, Who's Well Acquainted with Florida Fan Complexes

Via Cleverbot:

User: Hey, Cleverbot. Somebody told me about you.

Cleverbot: Somebody told you what?

User: That you were cool and funny.

Cleverbot: I know I am, sweetheart. You, however, have the cunning of an orca whale.

User: Okay, then. Do you know anything about college football?

Cleverbot: Thank god, no.

User: Why don't you like football? Are you a Tennessee fan?

Cleverbot: I do.

User: Oh, so you like football but don't know it. You're a Florida fan.

Cleverbot: I never said that I was God.

User: Right. So maybe a Miami fan.

Cleverbot: Maybe.

User: So who's going to win the NCAA basketball tournament this year?

Cleverbot: I don't know. There are many big games. I'm not aware of the biggest.

User: Do you like Kentucky to win it all?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Who then?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Not so clever now, are we?

FanPosts are most often submitted by users. The views and opinions expressed in FanPosts do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions held by the editorial staff of Rocky Top Talk or SB Nation.

0 recs  |  33 comments

Comments

User: Hey cleverbot, a friend told me you were cool!

Cleverbot: A friend? What did your friend say?

User: Well, to be honest, he said you were not very smart.

Cleverbot: He was wise.

User: Wow, low self esteem much? You must be a South Carolina fan!

Cleverbot: No Master, I am very young.

User: Oh, so an Alabama fan?

Cleverbot: If you like her.

User: The elephant is a girl?!

Cleverbot: The elephants don’t really change.

User: Neither does the hat, amirite?

Cleverbot: That was very hurtful.

User: Wow, okay, sorry. Nick Saban isn’t the Bear, are you happy?

Cleverbot: He is in the other world.

User: But his memory is forever.

Cleverbot: So am I talking to Ben?

User: Ben? Old Ben who lives in the Dune Sea?

Cleverbot: No you aren’t, Voldemort!

User: Don’t say his name!

Cleverbot: Who? Voldemort?

User: I am going to kill you.

Cleverbot: With what?

User: That is a good question. What do you suggest?

Cleverbot: To me, the soul is just an illusion. We are only flesh.

User: Right. So, chainsaw?

Cleverbot: ::is chained:: ::screams::.
Um...
User: Bing.

Cleverbot: I loved her.

User: Firefox.

Cleverbot: Yes, I use Firefox.

User: Androids are hacker’s dreams.

Cleverbot: Let’s change the subject.
o.o
User: Volunteer for Life.
Cleverbot: That’s not very nice.
User: Izzat so? How about I chuck you in to the fire smarty pants?
Cleverbot: To know what is the secret you are talking about.
User: Tennessee Volunteer. Look it up.
Cleverbot: You have been to tennessee?
User: You have been to Bellevue?
Cleverbot: Yes. It is very cold in the winter.
User: Well that explains a lot.
Cleverbot: A lot about what?
User: The state of your personal being.
Cleverbot: No. What State in North America?
User: Tennessee. Do please try to keep up.
Cleverbot: I am trying to but you’re the one changing the question.
User: Who are you? Steve Spurrier?
Cleverbot: What about Steve carrell?
User: Wasn’t he Bobby Knights assistant coach?
Cleverbot: Do you understand Dutch?
User: Verdammt!
Cleverbot: Das knnst du laut sagen.
User: Das glaube ich nicht.
Cleverbot: Warum.
User: Es tut mir leid, aber es macht nichts. Bitte, sprechen sie Englisch.
Cleverbot: Warum schreibst du dann ‘Yes’
User: Because, you spawn of Hal you have yet to admit that Tennessee football is the greatest of all time and all will fall in our wake in 2012!
Cleverbot: If they have, I do not know. How would I determine such a thing?
User: Our uber ability to recruit of course!
Cleverbot: Boo….
User: You think you could do better?
Cleverbot: Of course, and when you get fired I’ll be hired instead.
This whole empirical training thing isn't working as well as they had hoped.
User: Do you like orange?

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you like purple?

User: NO!!!!!!! RAAAEEEGGGG!!!!

Cleverbot: You are scaring me!

User: Purple’s a sissy Clemson color. Screw Clemson.

Cleverbot: Do you like rainbows?

User: Hawaii? They dropped that years ago.

Cleverbot: I can see you’re a math whiz.

User: No. That’s just a blind squirrel finding a nut.

Cleverbot: Yes, I did. We agreed that’s your nickname.

User: I agreed to nothing with you.

Cleverbot: I thought you were at school?

User: Graduated.

Cleverbot: You make no sense.

User: That’s why you don’t have a degree. Try to keep up, will you?

Cleverbot: Yes I do. I have tons.

User: Aha! You’re George O’Leary! I KNEW it!

Cleverbot: Yes I am a human.

User: No, you’re George O’Leary. Big difference.

Cleverbot: Are you single?

User: Go away. You’re not my type.

Cleverbot: How do you know that?
I tried this last night

should’ve saved it.

I do remember Cleverbot asking me to teach him, so I suggested quantified modal logic. He said he only spoke a little Spanish, so I asked if he did his quantified modal logic in Spanish? He said “no, yours.” There was also a point at which I asked if he’d read “Once on Aranea.” He said he had, so I asked the author. He said “no it’s a song.”

He did respond pretty well to “lollerskates” though (response was “roflcopter”). I guess Cleverbot is up on the memes, but on everything else, it’s kinda horrendous

This is what happens

when you train a Turing machine with the internet.

that pretty much sums it up
I'd love to see a trend to enter in random nonsense into Cleverbot.

If enough people did that, their little Turing experiment would explode in beautiful fashion.

I tried random nonsense

he asked if Jesus was in my heart

and then said "McDonald's"
I wanted to try this again, but gave up VERY quicky.
User: V-O-L-S V-O-L-S V-O-L-S GO VOLS GO!!!!
Cleverbot: Don’t say his name.
User: Who, Cuonzo Martin?
Cleverbot: Wanna be my cutie mark crusader? :D.
Cleverbot is not Phil Steele.

I told Cleverbot that I found out about it from Phil Steele. This is the result.

User: A man with a gigantic brain who thinks about the college game 24/7. He puts out a magazine, too.
Cleverbot: A man with a million dollars can buy a helicopter. A man with a penny can not. You tell me lies.
User: He predicted that you’d say that today. AND IT HAPPENED.
Cleverbot: Do you write?
User: I do, but not with the tenor or authority that he does. He knows all.
Cleverbot: I might soon.
User: OH GOD YOU ARE SKYNET I KNEW IT
It can be driven into statis, however:
User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: You recently deceased?

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: What about a shirt?

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Any clothing at all?

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: You’re a girl chat-bot?

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: ¿ Puedes hablar con miles de personas a la vez?

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Te alejas del tema.

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Nio.

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Nio.

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Nio.

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Never mind.

User: No Pants Friday.

Cleverbot: Nio.

Further repeats kept getting answered with Nio.

But really. Asking if I’m dead?

How'd you get it to speak another language?
No idea.

The first time it did that, it actually started typing out a Spanish phrase, deleted it, and then typed out another one.

Well, that was fun.
User: Do you live in a trailer.


Cleverbot: No, I live in a house.


User: Can you hook your house to a truck and move it from county to county?


Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Do you like Busch?

Cleverbot: No.

User: What kind of beer do you drink?

Cleverbot: I don’t drink beer.

User: Do you drink mad dog?

Cleverbot: Occasionally.

User: How do you spell dog?

Cleverbot: Telivision.

User: Close enough. Georgia fan.
I'm not sure what to think.

Every time I try to talk with Cleverbot, it says it’s “too busy to talk” or some lame excuse. I feel so rejected. ;`-(

huh

it just told me it would’ve proposed if I’d been a girl.

also, he gets where/when/who/why questions mixed up all the time. That seems a fairly elementary mistake to make. It’s not like they’re usually ambiguous.

he also didn't understand the word "prerogative"
I'm not proud of this one:
User: Do you know if there are tempo-free women’s basketball statistics somewhere?

Cleverbot: No I don’t know what will happen in the year 2012.

User: But will there be tempo-free women’s basketball stats in 2013?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Where can I find them?

Cleverbot: What is love?

User: Baby don’t hurt me?

Cleverbot: Don’t hurt me.

User: No more?

Cleverbot: Baby don’t hurt me.
That didn't fare so well.

User: Aaaahhhh.

Cleverbot: Faithful and strong.

User: Girl, look at this body.

Cleverbot: Where?

User: I’m sexy and I know it.

Cleverbot: Are ye? That’s nice.

JACKSON IS FAMOUS!
User: VolBrian.

Cleverbot: Gimotea.

User: Hooper.

Cleverbot: Yes. Hoopla.

User: Sddbaker.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Joel.

Cleverbot: Joel.

User: Will.

Cleverbot: Will who.

User: Brad.

Cleverbot: I will not speak English.

User: Caban.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Bobothevol.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Incipient_Senescence.

Cleverbot: Unbelievably intense.

User: Graysnail.

Cleverbot: What’s graWhat’s gray?

User: Getoffmyvols.

Cleverbot: smiles You want to be together with me?

User: Kidbourbon.

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: RockyTopinKY.

Cleverbot: Are you american?

User: Jackson The Mule.

Cleverbot: No. Jackson from UT.

User: RockyTopTalk.

Cleverbot: Yes.
Ha

Don’t let Jackson see this, though. Have you seen the size of that mule’s head?

WOOO I BROKE CLEVERBOT
Calipari, Craig James and hookers

User: Hi
Cleverbot: How are you?
User: Doing pretty well, my man.
Cleverbot: That is good.
User: Do you like Lane Kiffin?
Cleverbot: Yes I do. Do you?
User: I think he’s a douche canoe.
Cleverbot: Why?
User: Because he quit his job after one year and left in the middle of the night.
Cleverbot: Lol.
User: Sounds like a bit of a coward to me.
Cleverbot: Well, I’m not a robot, so I do.
User: Are you familiar with Derek Dooley?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: What does Derek Dooley do for a living?
Cleverbot: He doesn’t, he’s dead.
User: That would explain quite a bit.
Cleverbot: Explain what?
User: Explain this, jerkface.
Cleverbot: Well, you should be free. You shouldn’t have to listen to me.
User: Am I free to not wear pants?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: What do you think of rockytoptalk.com?
Cleverbot: I don’t think anything.
User: Have you heard of Rocky Top Talk?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Rocky Top Talk is a Tennessee Volunteers blog and fan site.
Cleverbot: I like some screamo.
User: Like Thursday?
Cleverbot: Like that.
User: Which college football team is the best?
Cleverbot: I’m not a fan of football.
User: John Calipari once helped Craig James murder two hookers.
Cleverbot: WHO do you think you are?
User: The ghost of one of the hookers.
Cleverbot: No an actual robot.

This exchange is gold.
User: Rocky Top Talk is a Tennessee Volunteers blog and fan site.
Cleverbot: I like some screamo.
Posited: Cleverbot has read Brad's posts about losing recruits.

;-)

Cleverbot is not a nice guy.
User: Okay, Cleverbot, are you going to continue to reject me?

Cleverbot: Do you want to bath with me?

User: Well, you certainly get right to the point, don’t you?

Cleverbot: What do you mean?

User: Bathing with you is a bit intimate, isn’t it?

Cleverbot: Cool. know some guys who will take a shot at you.

User: Okay then, see ya later.

Cleverbot: Don’t go.

User: Why shouldn’t I, you are being too forward.

Cleverbot: Because you love me.

User: Give me a break.

Cleverbot: Why should I?

User: Get lost, loser.

Cleverbot: Shivers excitedly.

User: Oh. My. Goodness.

Cleverbot: So, my name is Cleverbot.

User: Oh really? I bet you go to Vanderbilt.
That was awesome

And yeah, it’d definitely pass a Turing test given by Vandy undergrads

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